Everyday I read Facebook updates and WhatsApp messages and listen to conversations centred around complaints about young children. I remember as a child my mum saying that so many people wish their children onto the next stage or wish they stayed at an earlier stage, never enjoying the stage they were at. She was right. Friends with young babies? Constant complaints about them feeding all the time, not sleeping at night, dirty nappies. That's life with young babies, but it's such a precious time when a baby just needs nurtured and cared for by the people who made them through their love. Beautiful. Why would you wish those moments away? Then people wishing their toddlers were more independent and less inquisitive. Is it really a nuisance having to help them with daily tasks, answer their many questions, and stop every few minutes on a walk to look at a bug on the footpath? No, they are discovering the world for the first time and you're getting to share this with them and teach them. I am sure that someday these same people will look back wistfully and wish their grumpy teenager was a toddler again. You get the picture.
I am generally positive but have decided to embrace the 100happydays challenge for a few reasons:
1. My life is blessed. I have a wonderful husband, and incredible and inspirational son. Colin and I have well paid secure jobs, my employers have been so flexible with Daniel's extra needs and we have a lovely home with family close by. I also eat lovely food, drink beautiful wines, listen to inspirational and uplifting music and look at stunning scenery. Sometimes we forget the great things we have in our day to day because we don't think about them.
2. I need to get away from the slow drip drip of negativity around me - I'm largely avoiding Facebook these days as it's full of the two extremes of smug superiority and moaning. It's the winter, I'm largely housebound with Daniel and negativity pulls me down. I don't need it.
3. I'm getting competitive with the moaners. Have you ever noticed that those who moan most are those who have little to moan about? Of my 350 or so friends on Facebook, one lost her daughter in January, another few have children who have had major open heart surgery in the last year, a few have children with serious health problems (on top of my new friends in the Down Syndrome community) and I never see any of them complain. In fact they're the ones most likely to post the positive (non-smug) updates. So I find myself reacting to the moaners by thinking "You've so little to moan about. My son has Down Syndrome. He's 17 months and can't stand. He's on thickened liquids. He can't hold his cup to drink from. He can't speak. He has medical appointments every week... My husband has Crohns. He has had major surgeries, hospital stays and we've had to come home from holiday early as he was so ill... In the first five years of my marriage I've been a carer to my husband and to my son." I'm right of course. That is the hand life has dealt me BUT I don't actually think of my life as difficult. See point one. My life is blessed! It's that by dwelling on comments made by others and comparing my situation to their's, I become one of the moaners, even if it is only in my head!
4. Being happy is good for you. By focusing on positive things in your life your health actually improves and of course you'll also be a nicer person to spend time with! Why wouldn't we spare a minute each day to improve our lives? I've also read that statistic about once you do something for 26 days consecutively, it becomes habit, so by doing this challenge, I'll be doing something good for me in the long term, not just for the 100 days.
I think you can choose to be positive and happy in life. Let's see how I feel about that in 100 days time!
#NJW100hd
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